I've learned the hard way not to bust out new items for the first time for big events or momentous occasions (the time I wore a new mascara on the first night out after a big breakup, and not only did I run into my ex-boyfriend for the first time since it ended, it rained and I wasn't aware the mascara had run down my face until after I got home, for example). There's also the too-tight skirt that was determined to shimmy its way up to my navel at a press dinner, the wobbly heels that caused bone-crushing pain while I stood for photos with a celebrity, trying not to throw up on them - and well, you get the idea.

So with a handful of truly epic events featuring people that I really admire scheduled this week, this was not the time to trot out a daring new outfit, debut my new boots (I'm already planning whole outfits around them), or take a stab at a cat's eye one more time (I'm just never going to get it). I should play it safe and go with what I know works.

But then Vita Liberata Ten Minute Tan showed up at my door and I lost all restraint.

See, I'm very pale. So washed out in fact, that my nickname as a teenager was "Spook," as in a ghost (better than other ghosts like "Shmoo," I suppose). I dyed my dark brown hair blonde when I was 12 because people always thought I was sick and/or tired due to my anemic looking pallor. I tanned miraculously as a wee kid, but as soon as I hit pre-teens, I burnt quickly and brightly - always accompanied by shocking white patches outlined in the shape of bandanas (it was an earlier time), Swatch watches (it's plural - you wore two at a time), velour short shorts complete with satin trim (oh lord), and whatever "fashion" I was trying to rock at the time. 

I tried to live with it and then get over it, but we live in a world where having pasty and colourless skin isn't just not cool - it's not attractive.

So self-tanners are a saviour for someone like me who can never achieve an even tan on my own (I've tried in recent years too, but the fact remains I burn to a crisp and then it maddeningly never develops into a golden glow - instead just ghosts, never to be seen again).

Having tried Vita Liberata Self Tan Dry Oil last summer, I already knew the brand R-O-C-K-E-D. Now here was the promise of darker skin in just 10 minutes. Tanned AND efficient? I'm in.

This was my first in-shower product, so I puzzled over wandering around the house slathered in tanning lotion for a full 10 minutes. I couldn't exactly sit and do work slick with cream all over my bod. Would I have to just stand there all moist the whole time? I don't do just sitting around very well, so I tried to think of ways I could be productive during this standing ovation of sorts - listen to a podcast, fold clothes, transcribe my notes via voice recognition...

I needn't have worried. Vita Liberata Ten Minute Tan goes on silky smooth and dries practically upon application, so I was able to sit at my desk and bang out some work before hitting the shower. Sweet. (p.s. Full disclosure: After being completely effective, I also watched two music videos and danced like no one was watching.)

I don't understand how something can be rinsed off in the shower and still work (hence my skepticism and why this was my first), but I'm here to tell you that Ten Minute Tan absolutely 1000% succeeds.

Not only that, you can deepen the colour by keeping it on for 20 minutes instead of 10. As I'm the colour of angel food cake, screw sun-kissed skin - I was going for the Zac Efron in Baywatch bronze if it killed me. This however, was extremely risky. I wanted to make the best impression I could on these VIPs, many of whom I wish to work with one day soon. I didn't want to show up with embarrassing streaks or look too dusky (almost as bad as being too pallid). 

But as a chalky, pasty person, the allure was too great. After all, most self-tanners give me only a slight colour boost, but it's rare that I get a "just-returned-from-Mykonos" deep glow. 

The world’s fastest self-tanner allowed me to achieve not just a medium tan by the time my Uber arrived for the epic event (development happens six to eight hours after your shower), it looked completely natural and without a single streak (Note: I did the recommended exfoliating prior to application, and used Vita Liberata's Tanning Mitt for flawless, effortless blending. You should too). And it can be applied daily to build up the intensity of your tan.

That's not all. There are other supreme bonuses too:

- No more worrying about the risk of product transferring and staining your clothes, towels and sheets (Read: no more annoying "air-drying" - fanning yourself and waiting around for your self-tanner to dry before getting dressed. Hallelujah).

- Vita Liberata’s high-performing tanning formula comes with advanced organic technology by way of Matrixyl 3000 Peptide Complex, a super ingredient that plumps and improves the appearance of your skin (Fine lines? What fine lines?) while boosting natural collagen production. Yeah, that's right. This isn't just yet another run-of-the-mill self-tanner. Nuh uh. This right here refines your skin in the moment, and then works to make its future self better and brighter. Whoa.

- As someone who can't live without daily moisturizer, I was shocked to experience such rich hydration from Ten Minute Tan alone. Thanks to anti-aging extracts like vitamin C-filled Neroli, and omega oils courtesy of rosehip, I was able to skip my everyday slather and rely on Vita Liberata to keep my skin looking and feeling nourished, and hydrated, not to mention smooth and radiant too. 

- I actually like the smell of self-tanners, but most find it off-putting, so you'll be pleased to know that thanks to VL's proprietary patented Odour Remove technology, you won't experience any unpleasant aromas.